Something to Hold Onto
by AgentRez
Summary: Post season 5 JackAudrey story...spoilers through 1 AM.


_This is a Jack/Audrey fanfiction that takes place essentially after the season is over. The first part is from Audrey's POV and it will either alternate or just go by whoever's POV I think will be better for each chapter. I started writing it before I saw the 1 AM episode so I had to redo it._

I have not seen 5×20 yet (hence the new temporary avatar, so I can post in the UK forum) because I stupidly recorded the wrong channel last night, so I don't know if Heller's death has been confimed, disproven, or remains a mystery. My dad said he was going to overnight his copy to me so I should get to watch tomorrow (5/3/06)…until then please don't tell me if I'm right or not about Heller.  


_Audrey has been under anesthesia at the CTU clinic and is just waking up. The first part of this is from her point of view and the next part will be from Jack's POV. Nobody in this part belongs to me…all the characters belong to the producers and writers of the show. (In other words, I'm not exactly sure who has technical ownership of the characters as intellectual property, but it ain't me.)_

_BTW, I do have other stories besides Jack and Audrey fanfics...I've just been on a role with those lately. To see my other stories check my website...they got deleted from here or were not posted because of formatting issues.  
_

_SPOILER WARNING: THROUGH 1 AM OF SEASON 5 - OVERSEAS VIEWERS STAY AWAY FOR NOW_

* * *

"What the hell do you mean, compelling evidence?" I hear my dad yell. "Some terrorist said she did it and that's enough to warrant injecting her with a military grade pain inducer?"

I open my eyes, and at first I'm not quite sure where I am. It looks like a hospital or something. I think for a minute and then it all comes back to me. The airport, my dad tying us up, Henderson's men attacking, Henderson slicing my arm, Jack carrying me out to the car, my father driving into the lake…

Someone says something inaudible, to which Dad responds "don't give me that bullmudflap! I want to know who's responsible for this! Who gave the order to torture my daughter?"

Wait a second. What is he doing here? Does that mean everything was just a nightmare? Wait, but does that mean Jack being alive was just a dream too? And why am I in the hospital, and why is Dad talking about me being tortured if it was all just a dream? Now I'm really confused. Maybe I'm still asleep…

Dad turns around and sees through the glass door that I am awake. He turns to someone, I think his name is Miles, and says "don't think you've heard the last of this" and then hurries into the room and runs over to me.

"Dad?" I ask tentatively, still trying to figure out what's real and what was a dream.

"Audie? How are you doing, sweetie?" he asks, sounding worried.

"I'm…I'm okay," I reply. "A little numb…I can't feel my arm."

"That's because they had to numb it to stitch it up. But don't worry. The doctor says he expects you to regain full use of it, thank g-d."

"I…I thought…" I start stammering, realizing I don't even know what I think.

"You're wondering what the hell is going on and what I'm doing here?" Dad asks gently. I nod, relieved that he seems to understand.

"I was driving an armored car designed to provide total protection…it had air life support and multi-layer glass with a polycarbonate inner layer, so no water got in the car…I couldn't contact you right away because I was afraid of being detected."

"So you're okay?" I ask hopefully, somehow afraid to believe it.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he says. "Jack's alright too, in case you were worried about him," Dad says, reading my thoughts. "I just talked to him a little while ago. He was on his way back from Van Nuys, so he should be here any minute."

I nod, feeling really relieved but still confused.

"What happened? Did he get the recording back?"

"Not exactly. Someone else got to it and destroyed it, but by that point there were enough people who knew about or suspected Logan's involvement that he realized he didn't have a choice but to step down. His resignation becomes effective in less than an hour."

I smile weakly, feeling really relieved. Dad notices me twitching uncomfortably as my arm starts to regain some sensation, and he sighs regretfully.

"This is all my fault," he laments. "I never should have left you there…I should have listened to you."

"Dad…"

Before I can argue with him I notice him staring down the hall. I lift my head up ever so slightly and see Jack walking down the hall. He stares at me from outside the room but seems hesitant to come in, probably because my father's here. I lift up my good arm to motion for him to come in, and Dad nods to him as confirmation. He looks a little awkward as he enters the room. Luckily Dad breaks the ice by getting right to the point.

"Jack, I can't thank you or apologize enough. I was wrong…I should have listened to you."

"We both did what we thought was best for this country, sir. I'm just glad you're both okay," Jack responds. I marvel at how despite his lack of regard for authority he can be quite the diplomat when he wants to.

"So am I," Dad agrees, looking at me meaningfully as he gets up and kisses my forehead, then pats Jack on the shoulder.

"I'm going to give you guys a chance to talk…I'll be on the floor if you need anything."

Dad leaves the room, and Jack approaches me tentatively. All of a sudden it feels awkward between us, now that the stress of the day is over and we actually have time to talk about everything.

"How's your arm?" he asks tentatively.

"Okay for now…I can't really feel it…Dad said they numbed it before doing stitches, but he said they expect it to heal okay."

Jack is visibly relieved. He still seems hesitant, so I motion for him to come closer and sit in the chair next to the bed, then take his hand with my other arm when it becomes close enough to reach.

"What's going on?" I ask, not quite sure what else to say.

He starts rehashing the details of what happened after Curtis took me back to CTU, which I want to hear, but I can't shake this uneasy feeling so I eventually interrupt him.

"Jack…" I interrupt suddenly. He looks at me curiously. "That's not what I meant."

He sighs and takes a deep breath, unable to look me in the eye for some reason.

"Audrey, I love you," he begins slowly in a tone that makes me uneasy.

"I love you too," I whisper, hoping that he just needs a little reassurance. Unfortunately, when he looks away I know it's not that simple.

"It's not that simple, is it?" I ask.

"No," he says, looking down.

I wait anxiously as he struggles to figure out how to say what he need to say. I am prepared for him to say that he needs time to get his life back together, or that he's no good for me, or that his daughter's right about people dying whenever he's around. I am prepared for that and I think I'm prepared to convince him that I need him as much as he needs me. But there's no way I'm prepared for the bombshell he drops next.

* * *

_To be continued... _


End file.
